User blog comment:Absolved/Ganran the Void Zombie/@comment-3391671-20160920205603

So, a contemporary zombie... champion? It's a fresh idea if not new, since the closest semblance to a zombie are and  who aren't as infectious as Ganran. As for how this entire champion goes, I have a couple things to point out, mostly in regards to the lore and its connection to the kit.

First is that the backstory itself is very generalized, leaving out a lot of aspects that would make it intriguing. Many aspects are questionable as to why they happen: Why is only Noxus after the and not other countries? What caused Ganran to not be able to dig into his beloved's mind? Why did these neither-living-or-dead creatures attack the tribe? Generalization is good when making a summary, but this summary attempts to add in bits of details that only confuses the reader of how you are writing Ganran's backstory. For example, one prime issue of your story is that it follows a basic tragic template. Following a template isn't bad, but when you do nothing to describe more than what makes this story a tragedy, we cannot empathize with both Ganran or. You would need to brush up on your story writing skill, although I applaud that you took the time to add in this satisfactory tale.

The other issue would be Ganran's story and his kit. His kit shows that he uses the zombie-like powers to fight, yet his backstory seemingly show that he would not like to opt to doing that. He seems to be a man with a good head on his head, so what justifies him using his cursed powers? Isn't he a talented user of mind control? If you are going to implore a zombie-kit, the backstory needs to abide by it to be convincing.