User blog comment:Commander Marko/Character Discussion (+ Mirage's Lore)/@comment-1330314-20141216141502/@comment-7709681-20141216144328

@ Marko: I like the writing of the story, but the lore itself brings nothing more for the character than just how she got her tools and a fight to showcase them.

As Will mentioned, trying to develope the story in unknown places and just reffering to known ones (Ionia and Piltover), not exploiting and trying to delve into trades of the character (E.g.: Technomancy), and giving no information of any kind about new content (E.g.: The unrelated Elders, the Choten, etc.) with which fell related to, are elements that degradate the story.

You have an idea (If not surely this draft wouldn't exist), but you should polish it more, right now the lore just leads to action without purpose, while implying that these should have.