User:Mineko Charat Lucky/Turnabout Tempest

Trial Day 1
*crowd murmurs*

Judge: *slams * Court is now in session, are both sides ready?


 * The prosecution is ready, Your Honor.


 * The defense is ready, Your Honor.

Judge: Hmm, I haven't actually judged a trial full of yordles before...

Tristana: Eheh... well I kind of find law a pretty interesting subject, so I have sufficient knowledge on how things are run.

Poppy: Likewise. I know law at the back of my palm, considering I'm a Demacian ambassador. Although, I do wonder how a rookie so new to trials can even make half a reasonable argument for today's trial...

Tristana: Heh, don't you underestimate me, Poppy. You'll be in for a huge bombshell! (This'll be a hard fight...)

Poppy: We'll see about that. Most of the evidence here is very disadvantageous to your client. However let's not waste time, Your Honor.

Judge: Very well. The prosecution may make her opening statement.

Poppy: On 18th April, 23 CLE, 22:00 p.m.. An artifact from Piltover Museum of Ancient History, known as the "Stone of Tecuhtli", is stolen despite tight security by volunteered champions. The defendant,, has declared to steal the stone using an ornate card marked as "C", to mislead suspicion from him. Unfortunately he does not know "C"'s heist techniques, while leaving incriminating evidence and eyewitness accounts behind.

*crowd murmurs*

Judge: Can you please share with the court the evidence that proves the defendant guilty?

Poppy: Affirmative. We'll start with this.

Judge: Hmm, a card?

Poppy: Not just any ordinary card, mind. This was the card used to declare his heist. As you can see, the so called "mark" is nothing more than a stamp, and this stamp alone can be enough to prove the defendant guilty of theft. According to the forensics report, the materials that made the mark originated from Ionia, the place where Kennen currently resides.

Tristana: OBJECTION! You can't just pin the defendant like that just because the stamp is fake, it can be anyone!

Poppy: OBJECTION! The only possible culprit is Kennen, and I'll tell you the reason now! The glue used to stick the stamp comes exclusively from the Kinkou Order. This special glue is used by ninjas mainly for stealth infiltration through walls and ceilings, as the glue remains sticky but does not dry out when prepared properly. Only members of the Kinkou Order have access to this glue, and  can testify to this.

Tristana: (Oh no...) So why aren't and  the culprits?

Poppy: More than four eyewitnesses have confirmed that, while they did not actually see Kennen, the thief on that night is of a small build, like us yordles, but with ninja-like speeds. Are Akali and Shen yordles? Even you would agree, that the possibly of them being culprits are zero!

Tristana: UGH!

*crowd murmurs*


 * I had nothing to do with this! Somebody tried to pin this on me!

Judge: *slams * Order in the court! The defendant will remain seated for the duration of the trial!

Poppy: In any case, the defendant managed to electrocute turrets, sabotaged  plane, evaded  and  suppression fire, and stole the stone right under everyone's noses. The suspect is caught a day after the heist, using the full might of the Piltover's security and machinery with the assistance of Akali and Shen of course, as he's a big trouble to catch and subdue. All this points to Kennen, naturally, as the signs of electrocution and evasion techniques all point to his capabilities no other yordle is capable of. Therefore, in my opinion, this is a pretty open and close case.

Judge: Hmm, agreed. There's no other yordle that has both the abilities of a ninja and controlling electricity. Should I now hand over my verdict?

Poppy: Please do.

Tristana: (This trial can't end now... I have to do something!) OBJECTION! There's so many questions left unanswered yet! We haven't even know the defendant's motive of stealing the stone. I demand that the defendant provide an explanation.

Judge: Poppy, what do you think of the attorney's request?

Poppy: Hmm... very well, I see no harm to that.

Judge: Bailiff, bring the defendant to the stand!

Tristana: (Kennen, I sure hope you don't lie, the fight's already hard enough easier...)

Poppy: Defendant, state your name and occupation.

Kennen: Kennen! Heart of the Tempest! Part of the Kinkou Order!

Judge: That's a shocking introduction...

Tristana: (That's really loud...)

Poppy: Energetic answer, defendant. But tell us, where were you on the night of the theft on the 18th of April? Testify to the court of your whereabouts, and do not hide anything from us.

Kennen: I'm not a liar like you, Poppy! What are you doing trying to pin me as a culprit? I did nothing wrong!

Poppy: ...

Tristana: Just cooperate with us, Kennen. I'll prove your innocence in no time as long as you testify truthfully!

Kennen: Alright, alright! You better make this snappy, I'm tired standing here all day!

Poppy: Defendant, your testimony.

-Testimony-

Kennen: On that night of the incident, I was in Bandle City, just doing my mission! Nothing special happened that night, well... except Rumble, he's cooking a large and weird portion of meat. I can't tell you what exactly I'm doing there though, it's a secret Kinkou mission!

Judge: Bandle City? Why can't you share the details of your mission?

Kennen: Because if I did, the Order will have my head off! But that's not important, yes? The only thing that's important is that I'm in Bandle City, not Piltover.

Judge: True. Miss Tristana, you may now cross-examine the witness.

Tristana: Yes, Your Honor. (I better not mess this up!)

-Cross-Examination-

Kennen: On that night of the incident, I was in Bandle City, just doing my mission!

Tristana: HOLD IT! Why were you in Bandle City?

Kennen: Because the Order requested me to go there.

Tristana: Has anyone saw you?

Kennen: No, it's because I'm a ninja!

Tristana: Then that hardly helps your alibi even for a bit...

Kennen: I told you I'm in Bandle City and that's all there is to it! Just ask the Kinkou Order if you want a confirmation of my mission.

Tristana: Ohkaaay... (That sure ain't helping much)

Kennen: Nothing special happened that night, well... except Rumble, he's cooking a large and weird portion of meat.

Tristana: HOLD IT! Did Rumble see you?

Kennen: No. Like I said, I'm a ninja.

Tristana: What kind of meat is he cooking.

Kennen: I don't know... venison perhaps. I did see large antlers from the carcass.

Tristana: Ugh, that's not how you describe meat!

Kennen: I have my way and you have yours, balance in all things.

Tristana: (Ugh... perhaps I should be a vegetarian) So where was Rumble when you saw him?

Kennen: Rumble? He's under that peach tree, behind your house when he's cooking the meat.

Tristana: (Aack... What is Rumble doing behind my house? Is he a stalker or something? That's creepy)

Kennen: Can I continue?

Kennen: I can't tell you what exactly I'm doing there though, it's a secret Kinkou mission!

Tristana: HOLD IT! Can't you even tell a tiny bit of what you're doing?

Kennen: Nope, if I did I'll be beheaded by the Kinkou Order.

Tristana: Fine then. Can you prove that the Kinkou Order gave you the mission to go to Bandle City?

Kennen: Well yes, here's the letter. You can't open it though, but you can see the Kinkou Seal of Balance encrusted on it.

Tristana: Alright then. (accepts evidence) (Hmm... now that I got this, and from the looks of it, Kennen isn't lying about where the mission is conducted, but he did lie about when the mission is conducted!

Kennen: Nothing special happened that night, well... except Rumble, he's cooking a large and weird portion of meat.

Tristana: OBJECTION! Witness, are you absolutely sure nothing out of the ordinary happened that night?

Kennen: What's wrong with you? Of course there's nothing odd that night!

Tristana: Have a look at this!

Kennen: Hmm... a blimp? What does that have to do with me?

Tristana: Simple. On the night of the incident, has been visiting Bandle City.

Kennen: ...!

Tristana: Wanna know the rest of the story? He was throwing lasers everywhere, and is causing a mass destruction. Everyone in Bandle City could feel the shockwave from his bombardments. So tell me, Kennen. The bombardment was nothing out of the ordinary?!

Poppy: Yes, we heard about the bombardment, so why have you noticed nothing at all? It's because you're not in Bandle City!

*crowd murmurs*

Judge: *slams * Order in the court! Witness, I thought we have already warned you to not lie in the court, I demand an explanation here, right now!

Kennen: Well, that can be easily explained. I'm a ninja, there's much more scary things then mere cupcake-destroying lasers, yes? Of course I don't find it anything out of the ordinary!

Judge: No reasoning? then without futher ado, I'll declare the defendant...

Tristana: OBJECTION! The defendant has a reason for why he's lying!

Poppy: OBJECTION! I believe no further discussion is required, we do not require further testimony from a lying defendant!

Tristana: OBJECTION! Your Honor! I wish to present evidence right now to back up Kennen's reasons for lying, as well as proving he's in Piltover with a witness in addition!

Kennen: Don't you dare, Tristana! You can't do this to me!

Tristana: Kennen, if you wish me to have faith in you, and prove you're innocent. Have faith in me and trust my decision.

Kennen: But but but...

Tristana: Trust me.

Kennen: Ugh... FINE! This is embarassing...

Tristana: Your Honor, I wish to present this!

Judge: Hmm... a letter? What kind of a letter?

Tristana: That'll be... well, read it for yourself.

Judge: Dear, Your Faeness just Stormed my Heart speechless, like a Sorceress brewing a Tempest. You caused me to rapidly, and I shall now  to you quickly. I heard of your experiments at Piltover, so at 8pm I'll come over. Come forth at Juniper Street, where I will arrive with a gift.

Poppy: ...

Tristana: ...

Kennen: Ugh...

Judge: Well, that's... a pretty awkward... letter.

Poppy: Nevertheless... how will this prove Kennen's innocence? As far as I can see, this will only prove Kennen is in Piltover when the heist happened.

Tristana: It does however, spawn an eyewitness that will help reveal this case's truth. Your Honor, I request for, the Fae Sorceress, to testify!

Judge: Very well. Bailiff, call the witness to the stand.


 * So, how would you explain then that the profile of the suspect matches perfectly with yours then? There isn’t any knowledge of any other YOrdle who is capable of the feats witnessed that night by the champions guarding the museum aside from you. Where were you exactly the night the heist happened?


 * “I was on a very secret mission, to reveal what I was doing the night the heist happened would put the Kinkkou order in jeopardy”


 * “Hmph That sure doesn’t sound suspicious, Concealing information to the court will only weaken credibility in your supposed innocence.”

To this Tristana stood up from her seat

Poppy turned around and solemnly pointed at the door.


 * “Your honor, Allow me please to summon my first witness”

From the public arose the bulky figure of, who cumbersomely made his way towards the center of the court.


 * “Rammus, Is it not true that you were aware of Mr. Kenne’ s whereabouts at the time of the heist?


 * “Ye”


 * “ Was he off the mainland that night like Tristana here claims?


 * “No”


 * “So, can you remember where did you saw him by that time”


 * “Piltover”


 * “Thank you Rammus, you’re dismissed”

With this Rammus leaves for his seat as calmly as he got up from it. Poppy spoke once more before ending her turn to speak.

Poppy took her seat as Tristana rose to speak.
 * “Rammus may not be a champion of much words, but we all know his steadiness of character and observant nature. It’d be wise for your honor and the jury here present to trust Rammus”


 * “Your honor, we must consider what our real suspect must have done to incriminate Kennen here. And I’m determined to prove you and the jury that a whole different kind of magic might have been involved in the heist. I hereby call one of my witnesses. Lulu! Please step forth please.”

Lulu and her partner Pix came skipping to the center of the hall, dressing as whimsily as she usually did. She really stood out as a sore thumb amongst how formally everybody else was dressing, then again it's Lulu we're talking about.


 * "Oh hi Mr Judge! I think it was a squirrel who stole the stone! Oh those mischievous things!


 * "Lulu, : was one the previous suspects but quickly dismissed as not being involved. I however question this point of view, I've heard you know Veigar can you please tell us about what he was doing that night?


 * "Veigar? He's so cute I wanna eat him. I think he loves purple as much as I do even if he doenst want to admit it! I havent seen him much as of late, he must have been looking at tulips. I think the Tulips were involved in this, one can never turst those!


 * "He has claimed ot be joinign forces with some unkown threat, got any idea on who that might be?


 * "Yes! Black butterflies! Black butterflies are mean, they like to bite your toes during midnight! They are undying alies to the tulips and Pix also hates them, so I suggest you add them to your suspects list!

To this last statement, I noticed Ezreal looking at first as bewildered as the rest of us but then nodded to himself as if he somehow understood something out of that pile of nonsense.


 * "That's enough Lulu" You can leave"