User blog:ObsidianLazarus/Feeling Trapped in Ranked.

BIG DUMB RANT, IF YOU WANT TO SPEND YOUR TIME BETTER, LOOK ELSEWHERE.
Just lost my 3rd series in a row. I dID horrible, going 1/13 as Kassadin. When the rewards for Season 4 came out, I got pumped to finish Silver and get to Gold, I even had high hopes to getting Platinum. ( I mean 3 months, shouldn't take that long, right?) But getting past Silver III is being frustrating, and I don't believe IN Elo Hell, and I'm not the type of guy to blame my team mates all the time, but that isn't to say that the games lost were my fault and I don't complain when something goes wrong. I'm not a saint but I'm nowhere near a toxic player.

This most recent series, I lost the first match, so I was a bit upset, probably my fault. Second match comes around, I usually go top so I decide to go mid as Kassadin. Ahri's not much of an opponent, but I get ganked, and she gets the kill. Instead of making a smart decision and buying wards, I bought a sapphire and got back in lane, and lo and behold, I got ganked again. They pushed mid at that point, and it snowballed from there. I was so frustrated, and League never gets me frustrated. I've never wanted to rage quit, or dwelled on one match for longer than it took to find another match, but I was so upset by the circumstances. My gameplay was terrible, I usually do good as Kassadin, but either the frustration was clouding my judgement or I really am getting bad, and I just kept dying. I even fell for incredibly easy to recgonize baits.

Ahri got fed, made other lanes a living hell, and we lost, completely my fault. So I've completely lost a game for my entire team, singlehandedly, and I feel like shit, so I shutdown League, which I never do. For some reason, I figured Spelunky would calm me down, but I must be a glutton for punishment. Getting off the point, though.

In an earlier series, I also basically threw the game, as I ulted as Malphite into the enemy team, but hadn't notice that our Trundle was backdooing, so my team followed me in, died and we lost. As I said earlier, not all games are my fault, I had a Malz that afk'd until a blue was available because Vayne grabbed it when she was near Baron.

What is stacking on top of the already festering annoyance is that it's only my series where I'm having trouble. When I'm getting to 100LP, I win a majority of my matches, but as soon as I hit series, nope. Sprinkle in the words of encouragement from my komrades when I'm losing a match, and I'm getting mad at a game I've not gotten mad for, in my 8? months of playtime.

I've never been a super serious League player. I joke around a lot, and mess around when I play with my friends. I random jungle'd TF earlier, it went horrible but it was fun. Playing for fun means you don't get upset so easily. Maybe it's just ranked, but it's really burning a hole in my head. Unfortunately, the only friend I can really duo with is a lower League then me, and he's always last pick, so he hates getting stuck with support, and I don't blame him, and he's trying to get promoted into Silver V.

TL:DR- I don't know what I'm getting at. I feel like I'm never going to leave Silver. I guess the league you're in is supposed to represent your skill level, so maybe I'm just a Silver player, and that's how it's going to be. I don't know what to do, because I really don't want to keep getting into a series just to lose.