User blog comment:Kenetron/Enigma: The Ancient Storm I/@comment-6292556-20130923161059

Oh, god. No one want to read this?

OK, first, it's not very attractive to read. Your choice of word is kind of poor. I mean, if you want to write a kind of fantasy fiction or someting, you should use more epic and beautiful words. Well, I'll take this line as an example:

"Meanwhile in Syndra's Floating castle, a troop of unknowned monsters appears to Syndra, the Dark Sovereign. Then she realize that those monsters are just visions when she tried to control one of the monsters then failed."

can be wrote as

"Above the sky of Ionia, the celestial fortress experienced the strange event. Syndra, the Dark Soveriegn, encountered a group of enigmatic creature lurking in her castle. Thought it is another attempt of the capital to capture her, she quickly drew her force of will to manipulate the monster. However, her power could not control even a limb of the intruder. With frustration, she unleashed her power to scatter the monster away, only to found them dissipate, like dust, like illusions."

(Somebody can do better work than me. Practice and you will be better!)

Anyway, the story is cool and interesting. Ionia is not a place that always be strike down with disaster. Waiting for next chapter. Don't give up :D